General Discussion: The life advice thread. Never do, say, eat or drink anything without asking how to do it in here first!


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psypholicious
psypholicious avatar

877 posts since 9/8/09

26 Dec 2009 00:22
Yeah pretty much everyone has said what you have to do,sooner or later this is gonna blow up and it wont create a good vibe around the house etc.Better let it out before its too late.Guy is taking advantage and its not fair,atleast you are going to say "i tried" instead of "if only i did this n that" you get me? and its going to give your mother a wake up call now you bring it up,she will start looking at his spending no doubt and might evaluate stuff who knows?
fjm11
fjm11 avatar

1098 posts since 29/7/08

26 Dec 2009 00:29
namor wrote: ^ basically thats all you can do mate. how she reacts to it is another matter
stelfox
stelfox avatar

8488 posts since 11/3/09

26 Dec 2009 01:55
By not talking to her about the issues at hand you're letting him influence the relationship you have with your mother, with is something he should have absolutely no influence over at all. You'd want her to talk to you about problems she sees, you're old enough to talk to her.

Obviously you can't see everything, but from what you wrote he seems a free loader. He may be able to turn his shit around but if you don't do something and it goes to fuck you'll kick yourself for a long time
Noble Locks
Noble Locks avatar

66963 posts since 10/7/03

26 Dec 2009 10:57
shes in love and he doesnt sound that bad. its just the norm in every relationship but with the roles reversed. and that age difference isnt a biggie at that age.
nothing you can do mate, thats life as an adult. its like that and thats the way it is.
EVERS
EVERS avatar

8580 posts since 2/7/06

26 Dec 2009 11:15
have an adult conversation with your mother.

mention you are concerned about the (apparant) profliagate spending possibly coming from her kitty. obviously it's her money and she's entitled to do what she likes with it, however it would sounds like excessive spending (him) for someone doing so little work, or (her) for 'gifts'

Attempt to address it as a non-issue, more an observation worthy of debate, to avoid any potential confict.
87
87 avatar

3357 posts since 21/6/08

27 Dec 2009 20:19
Cheers for the advice guys. I think I will address it with my mum but try my best not to make a big deal of it, just highlighting the fact that I think his spending seems to be a waste of money considering the fact that he doesn't work much.
schtoop
schtoop avatar

13013 posts since 9/4/07

27 Dec 2009 20:33
is monday and tuesday like a bank holiday? i heard the queen is giving an extra day? will shops/transport be normal?
Jesus
Jesus avatar

5998 posts since 7/10/08

27 Dec 2009 20:33
mondays bank hol, tuesday is normal
schtoop
schtoop avatar

13013 posts since 9/4/07

27 Dec 2009 20:38
awesome, cheers
Noble Locks
Noble Locks avatar

66963 posts since 10/7/03

27 Dec 2009 20:40
schtoop wrote: is monday and tuesday like a bank holiday? i heard the queen is giving an extra day? will shops/transport be normal?
thats 2012 and in march foo'.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1238611/Extra-days-hangover-holiday-Diamond-Jubilee-nation-gets-Monday-AND-Tuesday-celebrate-Queens-60-years.html

eliotness
eliotness avatar

1506 posts since 1/2/09

27 Dec 2009 20:41
who told you the queen was adding an extra day? Laughing out loud
sounds like you might have been had, nearly.

edit - apologies
schtoop
schtoop avatar

13013 posts since 9/4/07

27 Dec 2009 20:45
Noble Locks wrote:
schtoop wrote: is monday and tuesday like a bank holiday? i heard the queen is giving an extra day? will shops/transport be normal?
thats 2012 and in march foo'.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1238611/Extra-days-hangover-holiday-Diamond-Jubilee-nation-gets-Monday-AND-Tuesday-celebrate-Queens-60-years.html

why are they telling us that 2 years in advance?! just confusing everyone Evil
deuce
deuce avatar

13859 posts since 21/1/08

29 Dec 2009 10:50
does anyone know the best way to take legal action against a company that you've paid to receive a service, but haven't received the service agreed to?
its left me out of pocket by a fair bit, me and my colleagues are all in the same situation. we've contacted the police but they've found no illegal doings = dead end.
at the moment we're all out of pocket by a fair amount, just need any advice really Sad
any legal peeps in the house?
inversesquare
inversesquare avatar

6681 posts since 7/6/08

29 Dec 2009 11:24
I'm no legal eagle but is the Citizens Advice Bureau quite good for this?
robii
robii avatar

18857 posts since 8/9/06

29 Dec 2009 11:28
You need to take civil action in the small claims court. Probably for breach of contract - http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/infoabout/claims/index.htm

It's pretty easy to do and the system is designed so you don't need a solicitor. Whether the company will pay any attention to it is another matter though
Chilipepper
Chilipepper avatar

2236 posts since 18/5/03

29 Dec 2009 12:47
Jordan wrote: does anyone know the best way to take legal action against a company that you've paid to receive a service, but haven't received the service agreed to?
its left me out of pocket by a fair bit, me and my colleagues are all in the same situation. we've contacted the police but they've found no illegal doings = dead end.
at the moment we're all out of pocket by a fair amount, just need any advice really Sad
any legal peeps in the house?

Sounds like a civil dispute if it relates to services paid for but not provided - a straightforward breach of contract.

You can start a claim at court using a claim form (http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/courtfinder/forms/n1_0102.pdf). Fill that and file it at Court to start the claim.

Some guidance on dealing with the claim without the need for solicitors here:

http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/courtfinder/forms/ex301.pdf

Court fee for starting a claim varies depending on the amount of the claim, details here:

http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/courtfinder/forms/ex50_e.pdf

You'll need to write a little about the circumstances behind the case in the Particulars of Claim part of the form on page 2. You should collate any receipts, contracts, letters, etc that are applicable the dispute, refer to them on the Particulars of Claim and attach them to the Claim form.

Also, before filing the claim at court, send out a letter giving the offender 14 days to remedy the problem - this will show the court that you have amicably tried to resolve the matter before resorting to court proceedings.
AAA
AAA avatar

10012 posts since 15/12/02

29 Dec 2009 12:49
Going to a Thai restaurant for the first time tonight Puzzled

Whats recommended to have?
MoB
MoB avatar

36883 posts since 31/8/04

29 Dec 2009 12:53
AAA wrote: Going to a Thai restaurant for the first time tonight Puzzled

Whats recommended to have?

Did you not eat thai when you was in thailand?
AAA
AAA avatar

10012 posts since 15/12/02

29 Dec 2009 12:58
MoB wrote:
AAA wrote: Going to a Thai restaurant for the first time tonight Puzzled

Whats recommended to have?

Did you not eat thai when you was in thailand?

Totally forgot about that Laughing out loud

All I can remember having is green curry and seafood curry which was rank
nick2
nick2 avatar

7231 posts since 18/2/09

29 Dec 2009 13:00
robii wrote: You need to take civil action in the small claims court. Probably for breach of contract - http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/infoabout/claims/index.htm

It's pretty easy to do and the system is designed so you don't need a solicitor. Whether the company will pay any attention to it is another matter though

You can do the whole thing on-line too, it's really easy.